What I have learned.
I am twenty eight years old at this moment. Well twenty eight years, eight months, thirteen days, and fifteen hours or something. Let's not get any more defined than that. I was probably off anyways, because counting on your fingers never goes quite right. Or maybe it does, but not always in my experience.
1. Always take the high road. The biggest regret we have sometimes is knowing we didn't represent ourselves the way we would have wanted. I, for example, always wish I exited things, like relationships and friendships, gracefully. This has not always been the case. Remember that even if you are angry, feelings subside. We may not remember exactly why we were angry, but for some reason we always remember the way we treat others. Try to remember it is you and noone else that has to face yourself in the mirror every morning.
2. Forgiveness is a beautiful thing. You may not know what it is like to be the person who has made a mistake that hurt someone else. But it haunts you sometimes. You always hope that even if you can't be in that persons life anymore, they ultimately forgive you. Take the time to find peace with others. Not doing so can haunt you as well.
3. Laugh at yourself. Often. It is hard to gain the ability to do so, but accepting that we are flawed and may always be, is something that allows us to let the petty things in life....go.
4. Understand that every person has a history, that history may not include you, but you are on a that persons path for a reason. If they had not taken those roads, maybe you wouldn't be standing where you are now. Sometimes we love something so much we never think we can love anything more, until we do.
5. Be honest. I can't even express how much I respect honesty. Maybe it is because we live in a world where people lie to themselves so much that doing it to others seems like such an easy task. Be bold in knowing who you are, and also that it is okay be naked in front of others, especially if you trust them to love you. You never know if you can trust someone until you trust them.
6. Always try to go to bed having resolved the days events. Sometimes we are exhausted, and life hands us more than we can deal with until morning, but when it comes to the people that matter, take that extra minute to say hey, despite all the chaos, I respect the hell out of you. Sometimes you never get to, you forget to, and you never get a chance to do it right again.
7. The bathroom floor is a remarkable place to sort your thoughts. Lock the door, light a candle, eat a blueberry poptart, count the dots on the ceiling, and wear fuzzy socks.
8. Have those conversations with your parents. The awkward ones. The ones where you tell them that you are thankful for all the sacrifices they made to make your life easier. When we grow up we realize that being an adult is a whole lot more than just making the decisions we want to make. I couldn't imagine having to make mine around another life all the time.
9. Have a day to yourself at least once a week. Even if you are married, have kids, have a giraffe living in the back yard, find time for a bubble bath, a long walk, a good book, or even just taking a private poop. Literally you need to find time, to be who you are despite who you are to everyone else.
10. Your brothers and sisters are the people who will always remember your moms laugh when you can't, your dads smile, the way it felt to fall asleep at home. They will always be home. Don't place them behind an agenda, always make time to make sure you keep in touch.
11. We always think we see ourselves better than anyone. Give people a minute to teach you something about yourself.
12. If you get your heart broken, remember that you will be okay. None of that, every storm has a rainbow bullshit. You are going to feel like you aren't going to make it. You are going to feel broken. but you won't die, you will get through it, and maybe you will look back and be grateful as hell for it. It may just be the best thing that happens to you.
13. If someone tells you to get under someone to get over someone, tell them to see a therapist. I promise you that sharing yourself, with people who don't know you, can be one of the worst feelings in the world. You are gem, treat yourself as such.
14. Don't rush relationships. Enjoy them. Have fun, laugh, make memories. If you fear what isn't, you will never enjoy what is. Don't be afraid of what might not happen, be excited about everything you won't miss out on by worrying about the things that WILL ruin it if you let them.
15. Don't set the same criteria others have for themselves for yourself. Life isn't always about having three kids, a dog, a white picket fence, and a mini van. Kudos to all you people with the badass mini van. But if you have a dream, chase it. At the end of the day if it is meant to make you happy, you will always make room for it. Don't define happiness by a timeline in your life.
16. Make a mess once in awhile. I swear to God the people who get mad over the tooth paste cap missing literally drive me crazy. ( I was once grounded for losing one of these, I am still a little irritated about it eleven years later). Enjoy your space, have a crazy cleaning day once a week, make your own rules, but don't lose it over the little things.
17. My sister and I ran out of gas in Colorado this summer. I told her that we had to make the last exit and to wake me up when we got there. She didn't because I was napping and thought we would find another one. We ran out of gas in the desert. I was a little mad at first. But then I thought, I have run out of gas so many times. And you know what I haven't in at least six years. You know why? I learned. So I smiled at her, talked about dead bodies in the desert, rapists, and I bet my ass, she will never run out of gas again.
18. Read your own journals. You will want to share half of it, and hide the rest for the rest of your life. But you will definitely understand yourself a little better down the road. And maybe even like yourself more. Either way, you will be reminded of all that you learned.
19. Always remember that we are all going through life, it's ups and downs, and we all have bad days. Don't hold it against someone who is. You really may have no idea what it took for them to go get gas, get out of bed, put on a smile. You will have days like this. I promise.
20. Smile like you mean it. Don't go through life thinking that it will always be okay. God never promised skies always blue. But he did promise to love you, more than you could understand. He is always listening.
21. Don't eat pizza at one am. At least not when you are almost thirty. Trust me on this one.
22. If someone cheats on you, lies to you, hurts you.....let them lose. I promise there are people out there who know a good thing when it comes a long. But don't do it for them, do it because you are one sexy and smart ass human being, and you don't settle for the bottom of the barrel.
23. We all through phases with drinking, sometimes drugs. You will never find yourself at the bottom of the bottle. You will however find the bottom of the bottle, everything else you are searching for takes real effort. Get off your ass and get it.
24. Hard work will get you every where. Not only this, but never be afraid to pick up a book. They will only make you bigger.
25. If the things that make you rich are in your bank account, in your drive way, where you sleep at night, you will be the poorest of the poor. Material things can be replaced. Find the ones that can't.
26. Remember that similarity, and compatibility, are very different. Find someone who challenges the shit out of you. I think the people I was most attracted to are the ones who pissed me off the most. Not by mistreating my views, but supplying their own to dispute it. I really knew what I was passionate about by fighting for it.
27. If you can't make something right, remember that some things can't be what you need them to be. Don't go out to change people, go out to inspire them, if you fail, I hope you at least have inspired yourself, or found inspiration from those you met along the way.
28. Don't be afraid of falling in love. You will get hurt. Fall down, get back up again. Feel everything. and when you are ready. Do it again.
29. Always be who you are, no matter who you are dealing with. Be consistent. If you want respect, earn it. But remember that not being liked by everyone is sometimes a very special and beautiful gift. If you don't understand this, I hope someday you will.
1. Always take the high road. The biggest regret we have sometimes is knowing we didn't represent ourselves the way we would have wanted. I, for example, always wish I exited things, like relationships and friendships, gracefully. This has not always been the case. Remember that even if you are angry, feelings subside. We may not remember exactly why we were angry, but for some reason we always remember the way we treat others. Try to remember it is you and noone else that has to face yourself in the mirror every morning.
2. Forgiveness is a beautiful thing. You may not know what it is like to be the person who has made a mistake that hurt someone else. But it haunts you sometimes. You always hope that even if you can't be in that persons life anymore, they ultimately forgive you. Take the time to find peace with others. Not doing so can haunt you as well.
3. Laugh at yourself. Often. It is hard to gain the ability to do so, but accepting that we are flawed and may always be, is something that allows us to let the petty things in life....go.
4. Understand that every person has a history, that history may not include you, but you are on a that persons path for a reason. If they had not taken those roads, maybe you wouldn't be standing where you are now. Sometimes we love something so much we never think we can love anything more, until we do.
5. Be honest. I can't even express how much I respect honesty. Maybe it is because we live in a world where people lie to themselves so much that doing it to others seems like such an easy task. Be bold in knowing who you are, and also that it is okay be naked in front of others, especially if you trust them to love you. You never know if you can trust someone until you trust them.
6. Always try to go to bed having resolved the days events. Sometimes we are exhausted, and life hands us more than we can deal with until morning, but when it comes to the people that matter, take that extra minute to say hey, despite all the chaos, I respect the hell out of you. Sometimes you never get to, you forget to, and you never get a chance to do it right again.
7. The bathroom floor is a remarkable place to sort your thoughts. Lock the door, light a candle, eat a blueberry poptart, count the dots on the ceiling, and wear fuzzy socks.
8. Have those conversations with your parents. The awkward ones. The ones where you tell them that you are thankful for all the sacrifices they made to make your life easier. When we grow up we realize that being an adult is a whole lot more than just making the decisions we want to make. I couldn't imagine having to make mine around another life all the time.
9. Have a day to yourself at least once a week. Even if you are married, have kids, have a giraffe living in the back yard, find time for a bubble bath, a long walk, a good book, or even just taking a private poop. Literally you need to find time, to be who you are despite who you are to everyone else.
10. Your brothers and sisters are the people who will always remember your moms laugh when you can't, your dads smile, the way it felt to fall asleep at home. They will always be home. Don't place them behind an agenda, always make time to make sure you keep in touch.
11. We always think we see ourselves better than anyone. Give people a minute to teach you something about yourself.
12. If you get your heart broken, remember that you will be okay. None of that, every storm has a rainbow bullshit. You are going to feel like you aren't going to make it. You are going to feel broken. but you won't die, you will get through it, and maybe you will look back and be grateful as hell for it. It may just be the best thing that happens to you.
13. If someone tells you to get under someone to get over someone, tell them to see a therapist. I promise you that sharing yourself, with people who don't know you, can be one of the worst feelings in the world. You are gem, treat yourself as such.
14. Don't rush relationships. Enjoy them. Have fun, laugh, make memories. If you fear what isn't, you will never enjoy what is. Don't be afraid of what might not happen, be excited about everything you won't miss out on by worrying about the things that WILL ruin it if you let them.
15. Don't set the same criteria others have for themselves for yourself. Life isn't always about having three kids, a dog, a white picket fence, and a mini van. Kudos to all you people with the badass mini van. But if you have a dream, chase it. At the end of the day if it is meant to make you happy, you will always make room for it. Don't define happiness by a timeline in your life.
16. Make a mess once in awhile. I swear to God the people who get mad over the tooth paste cap missing literally drive me crazy. ( I was once grounded for losing one of these, I am still a little irritated about it eleven years later). Enjoy your space, have a crazy cleaning day once a week, make your own rules, but don't lose it over the little things.
17. My sister and I ran out of gas in Colorado this summer. I told her that we had to make the last exit and to wake me up when we got there. She didn't because I was napping and thought we would find another one. We ran out of gas in the desert. I was a little mad at first. But then I thought, I have run out of gas so many times. And you know what I haven't in at least six years. You know why? I learned. So I smiled at her, talked about dead bodies in the desert, rapists, and I bet my ass, she will never run out of gas again.
18. Read your own journals. You will want to share half of it, and hide the rest for the rest of your life. But you will definitely understand yourself a little better down the road. And maybe even like yourself more. Either way, you will be reminded of all that you learned.
19. Always remember that we are all going through life, it's ups and downs, and we all have bad days. Don't hold it against someone who is. You really may have no idea what it took for them to go get gas, get out of bed, put on a smile. You will have days like this. I promise.
20. Smile like you mean it. Don't go through life thinking that it will always be okay. God never promised skies always blue. But he did promise to love you, more than you could understand. He is always listening.
21. Don't eat pizza at one am. At least not when you are almost thirty. Trust me on this one.
22. If someone cheats on you, lies to you, hurts you.....let them lose. I promise there are people out there who know a good thing when it comes a long. But don't do it for them, do it because you are one sexy and smart ass human being, and you don't settle for the bottom of the barrel.
23. We all through phases with drinking, sometimes drugs. You will never find yourself at the bottom of the bottle. You will however find the bottom of the bottle, everything else you are searching for takes real effort. Get off your ass and get it.
24. Hard work will get you every where. Not only this, but never be afraid to pick up a book. They will only make you bigger.
25. If the things that make you rich are in your bank account, in your drive way, where you sleep at night, you will be the poorest of the poor. Material things can be replaced. Find the ones that can't.
26. Remember that similarity, and compatibility, are very different. Find someone who challenges the shit out of you. I think the people I was most attracted to are the ones who pissed me off the most. Not by mistreating my views, but supplying their own to dispute it. I really knew what I was passionate about by fighting for it.
27. If you can't make something right, remember that some things can't be what you need them to be. Don't go out to change people, go out to inspire them, if you fail, I hope you at least have inspired yourself, or found inspiration from those you met along the way.
28. Don't be afraid of falling in love. You will get hurt. Fall down, get back up again. Feel everything. and when you are ready. Do it again.
29. Always be who you are, no matter who you are dealing with. Be consistent. If you want respect, earn it. But remember that not being liked by everyone is sometimes a very special and beautiful gift. If you don't understand this, I hope someday you will.
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